Transgender Children
I came across this video on Joanna’s site. Please watch it, particularly if you are not transgendered yourself. But also if you are and have issues you need to sort out. This is serious stuff put across very well.
To put a personal perspective on all this, I got to the age of 40 before I had my transgender issues sorted, and although I wouldn’t say the issues were of a traumatic nature for me it certainly had a negative effect on my life/lifestyle.
Issues like deception, keeping it from family mainly. Doing what I did secretly. Feelings of isolation. Feelings that this was wrong. Knowing that what I did would be disapproved of. Worrying about whether this was a perversion, society in general seeing it as a disease/illness. None of this was understood in the 60s and 70s and society is only just becoming aware of the real issues. And, as ever, education is the key.
The people behind the production of this video deserve our support.
I’m just grateful that we’re moving forward, and society’s education today will mean a happier life for young transgendered people today and in the future.
But I have another hope. People will stop seeing us as transgendered and accept that gender is a spectrum, not a binary system. Some binary systems are good, such as computer ones, but it doesn’t work for gender. When society comes to terms with this it will be the dawning of a new day.
on February 28th, 2007 at 10:59 pm
The problem is, even 10 - 15 years ago, information was reasonably easy to get… assuming you had a modem and knew what you were looking for in the mess that was BBS’s. The internet has changed all of that, hopefully for the better… the issue, to my mind, has never been telling the kids where to go for help. The issue is and always has been (to my mind) is that there can be a big, often nasty roadblock in the way. The parents.
No amount of counselling is going to make a bigoted/closed minded parent change how they feel about their child; and that child will pay a very steep price for stepping out of what is “acceptable normal” either psychological or physical often both. And here is the problem, from personal experience, this issue is the one that often ends in a parents fist appearing at high speed, completely out of the blue. In my case, even if people such as this had stepped in and said “Hey, we’ll take the kid off your hands, pay us £££ a year for costs” the answer would of been a resounding “No” it’s much more fun when you don’t have to go looking for a weirdo to beat on.
As much as I’d like to see this being the way and the light, it’s not. But I do support their efforts in helping the kids out. Hopefully, they’ll also teach the kids how to fight and bide their time until they can get the hell out of there if that’s what the situation needs.
on March 6th, 2007 at 10:19 am
Sounds like the voice of experience. And that raises another issue.
I would hope that the organisations attempting to help these children will be listening to them and finding out what their real needs are. I feel too often adults think they know what’s best for a child and don’t do enough listening.
But like you I give them my moral support.
P.S. Sorry it took so long to “approve” your comment (been really busy, story of my life) but your comments won’t need approving from now on - it should only ever be the first one. :)
on March 28th, 2007 at 12:07 am
Not a problem :) Been busy as hell myself :(
The other problem with a group such as this is false positives; until a person is in their teens the personality hasn’t had time to really form and gestate. True the GID is present from birth but without the personality you can’t make a solid diagnosis. So you have a kid who wants to be a girl (or boy)… you go to this group and they help out and everything starts to fall in to place.
Then you end up with a rather confused teen who actually isn’t and it was just a phase… then what do you do with them? Can’t just go ’sod it’ and throw them to the wolves so you end up with the additional costs and confusions of putting it right.
As you say kids often know their own minds and if agreeable are more than happy to compromise if it’s explained to them simply (not goo goo bay talk but approach them as someone without an adults repertoire of general knowledge and experiences)… so you might be able to get them in a holding pattern until of an age a psych can take a bash at them.
on March 28th, 2007 at 7:41 pm
Seems to make very good sense to me, but I’m way out of my depth regarding these issues. I’m only grateful that I haven’t had to deal with GD issues, just being a humble transvestite.
Mind you, with a successful transition I’m assuming there is an associated strengthening of character and confidence.
My only experience is of seeing a very close friend make the transition spectacularly well, both in personal and financial circumstances. In fact, as is all too rarely the case, her financial situation has improved quite dramatically whilst staying in her pre-transition profession.
But, of course, all this happened and developed well after her teenage years.
Again, I only have the utmost respect for TSs and what they go through.